Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

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"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? the redneck got to him first.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

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How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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