What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

there was once a jew

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

the WNBA.

What did the black man say before he went to sleep? im going to sleep

Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

I haven't left my basement in 29 years

what did the man say to the other man? hey

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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