Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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"Hey, did you hear that the Dungbeetles got a divorce? They live in California so she got half his shit."

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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What did the man say when he was stabbed on the street? Nothing, because he died.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

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Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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#Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Catherine of Aragon was one. # She failed to give him a son #He had to ask her for a divorce. #That broke her poor heart of course. #Young Anne Boleyn, she was two #Had a daughter, the best she could do #He said she flirted with some other man #And off with the chop, went dear Anne! #Lovely Jane Seymour was three! #The love of his lifetime indeed! #She gave him a son #Little Price Ed #Then poor old Jane...went and dropped dead! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! #He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #Some might say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! #Anne of Cleeves came at four #He fell for the portrait he saw! #But laid eyes on her face, and cried #SHE'S A HORSE! I MUST HAVE ANOTHER DIVORCE! #Catherine Howard was five #A child of nineteen, so alive #She flirted with others, no way to behave #The AXE sent young Cath to her grave! #Catherine Parr, she was last #By then all his best days were past #He lay on his death bed, aged just fifty-five! #Lucky Catherine- the last stayed alive! #I mean, how unfair! #Divorced, beheaded and died! #Divorced, beheaded, survived! # He's Henry VIII, he had six sorry wives #You could say he ruined their lives!!!!!!! And the moral of the story is: Never buy a car without knowing it's background.

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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have you ever had african food? neither have they

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Jordan is pregant

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Roses are blue Colton is gay

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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