knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Stephen Hawking

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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roses are black violets are black i am blind

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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UN

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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