A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

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True or fales? Eddie Izzard.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

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My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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Chuck Norris gets punched in the face.

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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knock,knock you suck

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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