Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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I think everybody should have a penis. Does that make me a bad feminist?

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here

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you give like i give lomain

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

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A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

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Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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what happened to the kid who opened the goldfish? he got eaten by a cixelsyd dinosaur

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What's better than winning the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark. Because he's a grown man, and most grown men aren't afraid of the dark.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Why did Charlie eat a baked potato? Because he was hungry.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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