Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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What color is an orange chicken? Fried rice

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

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woman's rights

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What do you call a woman in a kitchen ? There rightful place.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops