Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

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Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

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Why did Sally cross the road? Because a rapist was chasing her

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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Why are black people black? Because they're clearly not white.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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