What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

How many blonds douse it take to change a light bulb I dont know it hasn't happened yet

Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

Why is Texas so hot? The sun

How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert. It's the police, mam. We need to speak to you about your son Robert who? Mam, he was in an accident. Could you open the door please?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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