How would you rule?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between chili and a urologist? One is hot and spicy and the other analyzes urine.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Feminism

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You bumder!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock, Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops