how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whenever someone asks you why you're sad, always remember this simple answer so that people won't keep asking you more questions: "Because Hitler died"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the boy fail his final? His severe depression and progressive detachment from reality caused him to hang himself the night before

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats long and black? a baton

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what dyu call a jew on the moon? a problem. what dyu call ten jews on the moon? a bigger problem. what dyu call all the jews on the moon? problem solved.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops