Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

Two turtles are in a bathtub. One turtle says to the other turtle "Hey, can you pass the soap". The other turtle says "what do you think I am, a toaster?"

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

Whats worse than a joke? This

Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Yo mamma so stupid Her IQ is sub par

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

Knock knock, COME IN!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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