Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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say it ten times fast: oh

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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A duck walks into a bar. Then he walks out.

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

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Their was three black men that walked into a bar. They then ordered three drinks and had sex... I lied about walking into a bar

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What did the black man do after the white guy told a racist joke? Laugh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops