How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

I don't believe in giraffes.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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