This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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