What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why are rich guys gay? Because they can afford to be

why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

Why did thomas make a big mess on the ground? Beacuse he fell of a cliff

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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