Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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White men's rights

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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