Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He was killed in action and his family misses him terribly.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

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Q: What's more silly than the idea of a wealthy, successful black man? A: A Clown

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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