How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

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Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

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Q: Playstation 4 or Xbox One? A: Both of them are specialized desktop computers used to play video games. It makes no sense to argue or attempt to make any distinction, as they are the exact same thing.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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once, my brother took my lard and gave it to the less fortunet

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

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What do you get when you mix a elephant and a rhino? A nasty tasting smoothie.

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The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops