Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey.

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Feminism.

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

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YouTube Is Red Facebook Is Blue Porn Hub Is Down You'll Have To Do

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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