When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Jimmy drop his Ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Person: Hello Parking Meter! Parking Meter: Hello! The person then backed away in fear

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

thumb_up thumb_down -18

i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why do Christians believe in God? Because they're stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

thumb_up thumb_down -18

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops