How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

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What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

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A black man walks in to a bar and say ouch! A jewish man walks in to a bar and later sews that same bar for he and the black mans injurys.

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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Did you hear about the black man who went to college? He made a very successful living for himself despite this rough economy.

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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cool story babe. now go make me a sammich.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops