Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Skinny people fart less.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many orangoutangs does it take to screw in a light bulb? 16; mongoloid

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

thumb_up thumb_down -26

how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What’s brown and hairy? Brown hair.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops