Chris Bosh's neck

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

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Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Some poems don't make sense, Salad.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

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A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

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You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

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When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

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What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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So a woman walks out of a kitchen, she is instantly mauled by a bear.

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MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops