What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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guess what>? your mum lol

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what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

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oooooooooooooo yeah write there thats the spot what i was talking about my car

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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Knock knock? Whose There? Not Suzie, She can't knock

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And I hate Jewish people

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what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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What did the loser say to the winner? Good game

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops