Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

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What happened to the Jewish child that used to live life like a normal kid? Him and his family were taken to a ditch and shot to death. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Uh, Liz, he is staring at the screen... He says you are right and knows, so he cant get mad, ill trust you both, but it better work, or this one is on me. Oh by the way, yeah he is eating, sorry its late here, and I am the only nurse here about now Ironically this place is full of doctors but they dont seem to give a crap about the man that pays their checks. Doctors said no, Nero said "you are fired" Doctor changes his opinion, glad to see he is taking charge around here, I am just worried about his sleep, he is beginning to halucinate and I doubt any stimulants will help. But fine, ill trust you, sorry, really shaking my boots here, I really do not want to, but this is not about me.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

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Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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Why couldn't Timmy go to the bathroom? He was constipated.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

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What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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what did one tree say to the other spruce up actually nothing because trees can't talk

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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