Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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how do you make a quiet person talk? you water-board them

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A man walks into a bar not a duck though

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7.... because 7 was black

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How do you know when you've ritten too many anti-jokes? When you answer your own question as a rhetorical device

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

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what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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What has two legs and two arms? A Human

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

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Why did the black man repeatedly punch the white man? The two men were boxers. They were fighting in a charity boxing match. Revenue generated by the event went towards cancer research.

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You tell me. I have amnesia.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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