How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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