How is matt and alicia going last after summer They won't

Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

What's worse than AIDS? Not getting your sandwich.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

Roses are yellow Daisies are purple Tv drinks yes Why swing the door

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? The bench can support a family.

A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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