What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

What's big and white and can't climb trees? A mattress

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

What's funny about Antijokes.com? Everything

what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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