''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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A pigeon walks into a bar. Someone left the door opened.

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wanna here a joke? you.

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Q: What do you call an exact duplicate of Homer Simpson who's been enhanced with numerous special powers and a strength-boosting inducer among other beneficial additions? A: A mobidly overweigth individual who hasn't realized what the phrase, "Go on a diet", even denotes/implies.

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

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dyslexic's Untie

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How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

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A guy walks into a bar. After only 10 minutes, he leaves. The bar closes in 10 minutes.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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