A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call your mom? Mom

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

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how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? --probably just one, unless cerebral palsy runs in her blood, therefore her aid would assist her.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? A: Ow.

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Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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