Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

what's up? my penis.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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