How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

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kk

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Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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(sniff) (sniff) It smells like gross diarrhea in here... (sniff) (sniff) ... Yeah it does

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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