guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Q: Why shouldn't you throw rocks at a black guy on a bike? A: Because he could sustain serious injury if a rock hits him in the head, not to mention it is extremely rude.

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What do you call a black man playing a bass guitar? A bassist.

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The awkward when you didn't actually say moment.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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What did the german speech therapist say to his mute patient? There a few methods we can use to help you obtain the power of speech.

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What's worse than having an ugly face? Having a face like yours.

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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