- Anti Joke

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.