What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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What fires shots? A gun

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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What do you call a shoe with milk in it.... A milk shoe....

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

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what did the slave say to the slave owner i like your car

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

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Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

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Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

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An Irishman, Scotsman and Englishman were jumping into well because they were told whatever they shouted when they fell they landed on. I lied and they died, hehe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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