A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Who is John Galt?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

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A seven foot tall kindergartener walks into a bar. He is reduced to tears after being ridiculed for his inordinate height and unappealing physical appearance. A bartender then proceeds to escort him out of the bar for being underaged. -BG_Shank_A

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

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Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

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The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Why did the hispanic buy a pepsi? Because he was thirsty.

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What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

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What does a salmon and a falcon have in common They both live underwater except for the falcon.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Two black guys are seen running out of a convenient store. They've just received word that two planes crashed into the twin towers, both their sons worked maintenance on the 73rd floor.

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try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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Roses are red, violets are blue! Damn, the florist messed up the colors again!

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

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How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

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What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

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IMMA FIND YO ASS DO!!!!!

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Salt is brown, Pepper is white, my kitchen is in a mess.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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