Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

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Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

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knock knock. who's there? just open. just open who? you're really dumb aren't you

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

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Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

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What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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what do you call the head-less man sitting on your porch? By what ever his name is!!

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Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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