Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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George Zimmerman walks into a bar .

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roy g biv

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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You've got more chins than a Chinese... Girl with a lot of chins, because she's so fat

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HEY!

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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No!

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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How do you get 500 babies into one bathtub? a blender. How do you get them out? NACHOOOS

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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