How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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can you touch your toes? no

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Fat people

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What did the biological child say to his adopted sister? We are both loved equally by our parents.

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

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how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops