how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

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A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u say something about an I will punch u in the face u stupid cike!!!!

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A man walks into a bar. On impact, he suffers quite the blow to his head, resulting in him falling unconscious. He is escorted to the hospital, where he is pronounced in a coma on arrival. His family is left devastated. His wife, who was a stay-at-home mother to their 2 children doesn't take this news very well and is sent into a spiraling depression. 16 years later, the man finally wakes from his coma to find that his son and daughter that he had left behind where now grown teenagers and almost done with high school, his wife's has remarried and given birth to his half-child. This is why you don't text while walking down a sidewalk.

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? *snicker* F*ck a duck.

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Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

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Knock knock Who's there? Tom Tom who? Tom Rodgers I don't know you Tom decides to leave the house because the person in the house does not recognize him

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What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

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Knock knock. Come right on in.

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

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A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

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Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

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Q:the is a mexican and a black guy in the car who id driving? A:the cop

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I'm Polish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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