What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

Whats worse than death? Living in Agonising pain for the rest of the life that happens to be reading this statement.

autsim

A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

ur mum

What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

What a wonderful life!!! *gunshot*

your mother is in alkatraz as she was sentenced to 25 to life due to false accusations

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

69

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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