I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

I shot a bitch.

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

what's grosser then 1000 babies stapled to a tree?? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees

Two muffins were in an oven. One of them said, "It's sure hot in here!" The other muffin didn't respond because it's dead.

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

Killing your friend as a joke.

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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