What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

What did the white man say to the black man? Nice Pants

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

poop

What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

Hi, this is luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

Why did the girl drop her vannlia ice cream? Vannlia Ice punched her for being cool as ice.

Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

How many Haitians does it take to change a lightbulb? Typically one, unless the light bulb referenced is in an inconvenient location or is over-sized / industrial grade.

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

Yo Mama is so stupid, she believes in God. While her faith has absolutely nothing to do with her intelligence and in 2014 only the most bigoted and stupid people would demean people based on their religion,she does have an IQ of 65 and is therefore believed to be mentally inadequate. It's really quite sad.

BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

chuck norris was bit by a snake, a few hours later he died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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