Your mom is not fat!

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Cheese and toast

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

How do chinese families name their children I belive it would be child because chinese families are only allowed 1 child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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