Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

What's the difference between Elmo and Cookie Monster? One of them doesn't listen to Michelle Obama

Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

tim has no humor

One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries! -by Ross

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

How many friendzoned guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They just compliment it then get mad when it won't screw.

I like that, but why am I happy?

A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

Did you hear about the constipated mathematician who broke his calculator? He went to the shops and bought some laxatives and a new calculator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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