A man walked into a room and said to his friend, "I am about to show you something amazing." He claps twice and the lights turn on. He is using a device called The Clapper made by Joseph Enterprises, Inc. using advanced technology that was patented in 1985.

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Turkey Balls

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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Kevin: Why can't you hear a pterodactyl urinate? Bob: Because it's extinct? Kevin: No you idiot! The P is silent! Pterodactyl: RAARRGHH! (eats Bob)

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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quinn knows four other quinns but he ruined my life so he tells me to stop because im ruining this website but i disagree and now he is trying to tell me a joke and im not listening he is still trying but i don't care because i hate him,

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Oh, go away

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

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what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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