Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

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heat!

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

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A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

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What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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How do they call a black man that works in a mine. Miner.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

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What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

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Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops