Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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This is amazing! Visit http://psncodesonlinefree.com - you receive free PSN Card Codes instantly! Everybody uses this now!

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Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

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why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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Whats happening when you see your TV floating at night? You are probably suffering from some sort of mental disorder which causes spontaneous hallucinations and should seek medical help before the condition worsens.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Q: Why do black people hate country music? A: Because every time they hear "hoe down" they think someone has shot their sister.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

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Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

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You're tall.

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Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

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Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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My cat just died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops