a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

your face

Ask your friend: Will you remember me in a week? Will you remember me in a month? Will you remember me in a year? Knock Knock. Who's there? How did you forget me already?!?

Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

I went to work today....

Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

save me from the nothing ive become

guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

What's black and sits in the back of a police car? The seat.

A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

What do you call a black man with a PhD.? A Doctor! What are you, racist?

What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

Two strawberries are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other, "Can you pass the soap?" The other one says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?!"

why can't hellen keller drive? Because she is visually impared and there for it would not be safe for her to drive

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy, she has no arms

So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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