What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh wait i think i missed the joke, what?

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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An Irishman, a Jew, an Asian, and a Priest all walk into a bar This is an example of a well-balanced community

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A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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a man walks into a bar some other people get up and greet him as they are his friends. he then has a great night with his friends. he goes home and goes to sleep. he wakes up with a man next to him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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